Don’t be mistaken…

 

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Mistakes are common in the lives of all beings. Everyone does mistakes and it is okay as long as you learn from it. They are universally made but comes to broad light when others note them and tell us on our face. There are people who speak of it on our back, but I am not here to write about it. That’s like a hot potato which is quite difficult to handle.

I make and have made mistakes; be it silly or sensible. The effects of it pierce my soul like a sharp-edged sword when someone mocks about it or self- realisation hits me from nowhere. That’s when I began questioning why should a mistake of mine be mistaken when someone tells it at my face. I pondered on it for some nights and began practising a ‘Mistake Analysis’ time in which I sit in silent mode and look back what went wrong yesterday. I must admit that this five-minute time period is a great driving source to begin a new day with a new self.

At nightfall when the dark blue sky itself begins to rest a while, I write down the day’s events however small it may be in my diary and give thought to what went right and what went wrong for the day. I appreciate myself for being a better person today and condemn myself for the mistakes (be it words or actions) I did knowingly or unknowingly. This has so far helped me to know myself and understand myself in a better way rather than blaming others for their sour behaviour towards me.

When I began acknowledging my shortcomings, weaknesses and my own self, I perceived that I had been wrong most of the times in judging people. I have been wrong, but I blamed others for it which gave no peace and all.

Now, as I spend the MA time to learn about myself, I get the point that I can never beat around the bush all the time and turn a blind eye to my mistakes. It is not healthy for my soul and body. In this phase, I find that when people mock me for what I have done or how ignorant I have been in certain situations, I accept it with all my heart. With courage, I could now accept my mistakes and genuinely apologise for it. I no longer feel the sulking storm in me when others spit out the truth. They make me think and shift gears rather than messing up with the person who had the courage to correct me.

A very common example is how I deal with my anger. Being a highly short-tempered girl (or a woman) by personality, after every breakout of my anger, I reason myself that I am right and only the other person is wrong. It would be so easy to utter these words, but it took away my peace every time it happened. But now, when I get high on my temper for no reason, I still shout (which couldn’t be avoided L) but take a break only to realise that I have been wrong. This makes me apologise with no effort and get in terms with others soon.

There is also a different side to this story. Mistakes, yes, they are common, we do it and when people notice it, they tell us, and we correct it. On the other hand, it is not that we should always accept what others say. People have different opinions and when ours are not in line with theirs, some tend to mock us, blame us and advise us.

I believe that every being, be it animals or humans have good conscience etched in their soul. Only when the still small voice inside us cries out that we have made a mistake, be invited to apologise; but not every time someone says their opinion. We need not be sorry for who we are or for having a different state of mind than others. One man’s food is another man’s poison; you need not like what I like; you need not think what I think; you need not do what I do. Each person is unique.

We need not return back every stone that is thrown on us. Pick the good ones that would help you build your castle of perfection and let the other stones stay at your garage. The ones who threw them on you will themselves require them one day to build their castle; the day they will realise that their castle cannot be made complete without the stones they threw on others.

Any thoughts on this topic are always invited …

Happiness is…

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Happiness is being content with what we have and who we are

Without deceptive desires mind-seeping to push wanting more.

 

Happiness is living (and not just existing) for today with all our heart and soul

From the schooling of yesterday & powers of facing tomorrow’s role.

 

Happiness is a long walk amidst wonders of nature at the crack of dawn

To thank the Creator & admire the immeasurable charm to combat the lazy yawn.

 

Happiness is being a kid again to see the world from a different point of view

With an impartial state of mind & wholly unaware of judging others on racial flu.

 

Happiness is wearing a radiant curve on lips that reflects its beauty on eyes

For it spreads faster than light and soothes hurting souls without any lies.

 

Happiness is being conscious of oneself- their strengths and weaknesses

To chew over their days & bring to light a better version of their own selves.

 

Happiness is praying for loved ones who aren’t in our eyes reach

For it is the only virtual wing of protection we could ever gift each.

 

Happiness is running the race of life with fervent faith away from sin

With an assurance that Heaven’s door will open one day to take us all in.

 

Happiness is always a choice one has to make beyond the ifs, ands and buts

Without which mankind will for ever so long be stuck in life’s blurring nets.

 

 

Are You Worried?

Young woman,mama,Be troubled

 

Peaks and valleys, ups and downs are forever common in our lives

Without which no mortal could boast that mankind thrives.

Success and failure, good and bad times are the friendly spies

Secretly watching us as we break our cocoon and broaden our wings like butterflies.

 

Is there a single being who hasn’t faced this life’s ever favourite SORROW?

So, why are we anxious and sob fearing that our life has become narrow?

Has not God promised that He will care for us as He cares for a sparrow?

Wake up; let us confess our agony to our Creator who is always our hero.

 

Crying over one’s adversity FOR A WHILE is a welcoming act of self-healing

For it sharpens our blunt edges and strengthens us to stand firm like a hard ceiling.

Once and for all, raise again from the hurting ground of worry like a fresh seedling

To grow and help grow others to be a shade in the evolution of our fellow earthlings.

Home away

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Away from an aura of unsaid love I love the most

Destiny brought me beyond oceans to be the host

To build a clan on my own despite life’s raging coast

And to show mankind that I do have the best to boast.

 

Cultured as a being who had only little wisdom on the outside world

The sudden transition took me to a sphere that was so curled

Like the fresh folds on a wedding suit that is neatly furled

I sat still not knowing how to begin the process of being pearled.

 

Haste is waste! Like the turtle that slowly and steadily won the race

I began unfolding my baby self from the cocoon which was once my favourite place

Only to find that the world outside is far bigger and brighter than my face

For me to explore and build my own home away from home with much grace.

Ghost Girl by Torey Hayden- Book review

I began reading the book ‘Ghost Girl’ as soon as I came to the new country. Unlike other books, it took so many months for me to complete reading this book. After a gap, when I started reading it again, I was eager about how this story would end and this eagerness dragged me like before to finish reading it in a couple of days. This is the first time I have chosen to read Ms Torey Hayden’s book. She is an educational psychologist and special-education teacher who has authored many books based on her experiences with her special children.

This book is not fictional; it portrays the life of a little girl, Jadie Ekdhal who goes through weird happenings in her childhood and how Torey helps her get out of them. The story begins this way- Ms Hayden leaves her current job and goes to Pecking to be a teacher for a class of six specially challenged children. Jadie is one among them. The class had a permanent teacher previously who committed suicide. The reason is still mysterious. The teachers who came to take care of these children after her didn’t last for more than two months. They are a bunch of naughty weird kids. Torey has so many years of experience and thus, she willingly came for this job despite knowing the other side of this class. Jadie, the only girl in the class was into this special education classroom because she doesn’t speak AT ALL to anyone. Yes, she never talks. She is not dumb; she can speak but she is not willing to speak to any and this made the teachers job very difficult and frustrating. Jadie is also hunchbacked in such a way that it’s difficult to see her face.

Torey takes special care on Jadie without losing her patience and constantly motivates her to speak up. Upon doing this over and over again, Jadie starts speaking word by word to Torey. One day, Torey brings in a video recorder to her class to record the teaching hours so that she could review it later for reference. She once played the recorded video and found that in lunch hours, Jadie has used the recorder by herself. Amazed that a six year year old has operated a video recorder, she went through the video and finds that Jadie has made few weird gestures on the video. The astonishing part is that, Jadie was not hunchbacked in that video. She was standing straight like a normal human being. This surprises Torey.

As time flew, Torey starts talking slowly to Jadie and gains her confidence. When Torey works after school hours in her cloakroom, Jadie comes in and stands near the door. When Torey asks if she wants to come on, she nods and comes in with fear. But she doesnt speak anything and when Torey asks what’s wrong, she signals Torey to close the door and lock it. This began happening everyday and Jadie too began gaining trust on Torey. She comes after school everyday to play with the dolls that Torey gave her. Jadie started speaking but what she spoke haunts Torey.

Jadie once says to Torey that she is God and she is going to help her get out of all her problems. And Torey told her that she is not God but still she can help her out. So, Jadie begins telling weird things that has happened to her. She says that Ms Ellie( some unknown character) has killed her friend Tashee when she was six as six is the number that gives power. She also said that she’s been given coco cola everyday and her cat was murdered by Ms Ellie in front of her and she was made to taste its blood. Torey also found that Jadie is aware of all sexual activities as well. When asked what her parents were doing when these things were happening, she says that they were just not there or sleeping. This made Torey sense that some kind of abuse is being done on this child and to her two young sisters.

She takes this issue to the Principal who then calls the local police. But the saddest part is that Jadie talks only to Torey and not to anyone else. Even when Torey tries to explain everything, they want Jadie to talk but she does not do so. The children are soon taken from their parents and the parents are interviewed on this. But they get no evidence of any such abuse happening and Jadie is still not opening her mouth.

Torey as usual invited Jadie to her cloakroom and made her talk. Jadie told Torey that she should talk on her behalf and she wouldn’t talk to them as spiders are watching her and they will inform this to Ms Ellie who would kill her if she opens her mouth. When asked, if she wants to go back home, she says no. Torey says that if she must not return home, then she must talk. After a big pause, Jadie accepts to speak. The child activist is called immediately to school and she speaks with Jadie alone in cloakroom. Finally, Jadie tells her whatever she said to Torey and the activist is shocked to hear such statements from a child. This case was investigated further but they never got any proof. Torey suspects that this must be the acts of occult and they wear the mask of Ms Ellie to abuse the children. When she informs this to the police, they simply say that they should not believe such occult practices as they are professionals. This case has no end but Jadie and her sisters are taken to foster homes.

Now, Jadie is a twenty year old girl who is not crippled or stuck in the past. Once she was out of her home, she began changing and now she is perfectly alright. Though the reason for Jadie’s dumbness, crippling and abuse is not found, what satisfies the most is that she is now safe and sound. What else do we need to know in a real story?

This is my first book review and I have put the whole book in a tiny nutshell. The story has many more additions to what I have written. Jadie goes through a lot of weird memories in her life which cannot be completely described in a review. This book will put you in the shoes of a disturbed girl who yearns to get out of her hell. And you will also know the importance of a teacher’s role in a child’s life. You will find the whole story interesting when you read it!

After a year…

The last post on my blog site is dated a year back. When I look back, I see how much a year can teach and change us. So, now, as I sit in an other country with altogether different people and surrounding, I realise how much a year can do to a person. Time is a terrible twister. It’s not just a year that gets this credit. Even a nano second has the power to change lives and that’s how the world runs.

There are people who ask me to continue writing and post my experiences in the form of blogs. I didn’t know that people will still recognise me as a writer even though I have not written much. To all those who motivate me and expect that I can do the best, I thank you and would love to keep writing. It’s not that I have stopped writing; I do write at times but I haven’t posted on my blog as I felt that they are not worth reading. Alas, I learnt that it’s not only about what’s worth reading but it’s also about what’s worth writing. I trust that I can write content that are worth writing, reading and inspiring as well.

This is a new beginning to write and write and keep on writing for the art of writing when enhanced from time to time makes an article worth remembering. As I have written in my previous blogs, I write because I want to make memories. May be when we grow old and our strength and mind fail us, reading back what we have written would bring back the incidents- bitter or sweet and would make us realise in times of hardship how beautifully life has bought us forth. I will pen down my experiences, book reviews and poems on my blog with a hope that when memory fails me, this will be a life guard.

While in India, I read The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks where I understood that even when our memories fail us by age, what we pen down never fades away unless we throw the book or delete our WordPress account (just kidding) and would be a great reminder of what we have been in our lives. As a step ahead, I have developed the habit of writing diary everyday to note down the day’s events with all the mixed emotions I go through in the day. By writing diary, you befriend a new relationship. For me, I have a virtual relationship with my diary where it welcomes me to pour out my day’s happiness or sadness or anger in the form of writing. Trust me, like humans, it doesn’t shout back or console you or give a shoulder to cry but it does soothe my soul and calms me internally. At the end of the day, I know that there is someone with whom I can share my life and like human, it will not betray you at any point or backstab what I have said. I wouldn’t deny that it’s that writing which reminded me that my life is stagnant now and unless I take a step, I wouldn’t move forward.

Here… after a year… I am back to make memories that will last for eternity.

The Darly ‘Moon’

Standing high above the ground, you make me gaze at you every day

Adorned with pearly white robe, you move alone in the dark blue bay.

From far above the horizon, you silently watch my glee and gloom

With awe, I smile with peace as you are my never-changing groom.

Your roly-poly silver lined stature reminds how pure one could be

Wishing I were a bird so I could fly so high to witness your beauty sea.

Away from world’s lofty theatre, oh my dear, you alone enjoy the air

Leaving me down on earth where humanity fights for its own share.

When the mysterious dark yet cordial solitude endlessly surrounds your entity

The blue ocean’s oceans of kiss on your cool pulp brings in me endless serenity.

Bringing light into darkness, you remain my beacon of never-ending hope

Reminding to smile at the storm for every season changes in time’s rolling slope.

With wide open eyes cum fervent desire, my search for you begins at twilight

After the elated ‘hide and seek’, you emerge along the skies: holy and bright.

Moon, you are the darly my soul wish to look upon every night

For the love I earn from your is far above the riches of this world’s might.